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[x] June 2002 |
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 Sylvia Plath-inspired The Gift wall by TNS @ Dying of the Light |
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Finish Buffy Defence essays |
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"There's a fine art to growling. Most men will never get a real growl off in their entire pathetic lives... a real growl starts deep in the chest and rumbles up. If you growl when you've got someone pressed against you, they should be able to feel it. Feeling the way it rumbles is part of a growl -- but if you're really good at it you can get 'em from across the room, just by hearing it." |
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| l Friday, January 31, 2003 |
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H is watching The Witch... have I mentioned that I miss Bitch!Cordy (and nearly typed Butch!Cordy... let's not go there, 'kay?). "You're the Slayer, and we're... like... the Slayerettes". Sigh.
Okay. Have I mentioned how much I love clicking on random posts at B/A Fluff and wondering how long they've been in fandom? Really? Did I mention that the other day? Well, I'll be damned... because oops, I did it again. Question: Am I the only one who realizes how much of a huge mistake Joss Whedon made by ending the saga that is Buffy and Angel? I mean really what the hell was he thinking? Sweetie. Honey. You're posting to the biggest damn B/A denial list on the internet. But no, you're the only one who realises this. Really. Just found that very amusing. And needing a quick snark. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:01 PM [x] :: |
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I know that I feel guilt easily. I'm always apologetic, but when someone's rubbing something in my face... okay, so I deserve to feel guilty. I put them out, and I know I did wrong. I recognise that I was selfish and stupid and all bad things, and yes, this person has a right to be damned pissed off at me.
But the more they guilt me, the more they harp on it... last night I felt terrible about it. Self-mutilation came out again, and I was in Uber!Guilty mode. Then he rubbed it in. Again and again. And just did again then, telling me how selfish I was. Somehow, when it's repeated and repeated, I manage to feel less guilty. I'm not sure whether that makes me a bad person or not, but that's how it goes with me. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 1:28 PM [x] :: |
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Feeling a little disappointed, but basically unsurprised... the National just called, I didn't get the position. "You're a wonderful person, but..."
See, I said you can tell as you leave. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 11:42 AM [x] :: |
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News on the fire front: we had some more rain last night, about 15mm all told, so the immediate danger has waned. Currently, no one is on "high alert", but the fires are still burning; this is a bit of relief for the fighters as they contain and assess damage. A lot more rain than the two hours' worth we got then is necessary to put them out completely.
H started his new school year today. The only one left in the family in high school; I think Mum and Dad find it a little depressing. Mum and N are in Ballarat, enrolling N in his uni course. Everything is starting up again, I suppose. I still haven't heard from the bank, although that's unsurprising, given the time. They weren't any of the three phone calls we got before 9am. I try not to get my hopes up too high with this kind of thing, when waiting for a job interview to call and tell me whether or not I have the position. I'm pessimistic in nature, and given my self-esteem levels, I find it better not to expect something. Given I didn't have anything even slightly resembling a "warm inner glow" when I left the interview, I think it's safe to say this is the best course of action for me at the moment. And yet I still can't help hoping. I really need work, especially if I'm ever to a). get a car, or b). manage that Big International Trip (BIT) I so wanna make in the time frame I'm aiming for. Chatting to the two women at the interview yesterday, as they talked of how the National is this massive international thing as well, I was kind of thinking how that would work with the BIT. And I was half-doing maths in my head as to getting a lap-top (I wanna be able to make my screencaps, dammit!!) and so on... I want money again. We're actually getting a phone call a minute here at the moment, due to the fires. Here's a Useless Fact for you: the Uniting Church is the highest provider of welfare in Australia, providing more than the government and the Salvation Army combined. We also don't take anything out of money donated to the church, no admin fees or whatever, so 100% goes to the people. Given Dad's position in the church at the moment is pretty much in command of this region, he's the one everyone's contacting. There's also no official fund for the fires, and money is needed now. These fires have been going since the 8th January, and most people around Omeo etc have been fighting fires all this time. They've had no income in weeks, and just in grocery bills and so on... they add up. We're using EGRAM (East Gippsland Remote Area Ministry) as the source of the welfare so desperately needed, but there's so much organising to do. We're also unable to make donations tax deductible, which causes extra headaches. As a result, due to Dad visiting a dying parishioner in the local hospital, I've got the cordless phone next to me wherever I go so we don't miss any phone calls. And hoping that when the bank calls, they'll eventually be able to get through. BTW, found a better site if you want updates. http://cfaonline.cfa.vic.gov.au/mycfa/Show?pageId=publicIncidentUpdates&audience=PUBLIC even has a decent map :) The link I was looking for yesterday was http://www.sentinel.csiro.au/, and it's very good, too. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 10:05 AM [x] :: |
| l Thursday, January 30, 2003 |
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Smurfy's wishlist for Joss Whedon
Oh Joss, won't you give me a B/A finish The Spuffies are smug now, please make them diminish I've watched all the seasons, my faith replenished; So Joss, won't you give me a B/A finish Oh Joss, won't you let me stake me some Spike? It's really quite easy, like riding a bike Too many people would pay for the sight So Joss, won't you let me stake me some Spike? Oh Joss, won't you show me my Broody!Angel? This dorky version is making the pain gel, If I see him again, I think I would yell, "Oh Joss, won't you show me my Broody!Angel?" Oh Joss, won't you give me a B/A finish The Spuffies are smug now, please make them diminish I've watched all the seasons, my faith replenished; So Joss, won't you give me a B/A finish Please remember that people who read this are spoiler-free if you respond to the above, and also to what I'm about to type. The following contains spoilers for the end of season 7, so only highlight it if you want mild spoilers/are already spoiled. I know that David is meant to be appearing in SMG's final episode, should the storyline require it. But I refuse to get my hopes up. Maybe I'm bitter, maybe I've been burnt too many times... but one thing the infamous symposium (infamous because I still haven't written a report on it) taught me (other than it's possible to get hives when surrounded by too many redemptionista Spuffies) is that there is no way for Joss to please everyone. There will still be two or three episodes of AtS after the final BtVS; why doesn't that inspire confidence in me that we'll get the reunion and confirmation we're all hoping for? I also feel that it would be just like Joss to say that if he can't please everyone, why not please no one. Despite the weeks of fires, I don't think any have been as scary as today was. We're in the middle of summer here in Australia, if anyone happens to think that the northern and southern hemispheres have the same seasons at the same time (when did you fail geography?). The sun will rise between 5.30-6am, and set a little after 9pm. Today at noon, the streetlights were on and you needed headlights on the car. It was raining ash; it was everywhere, getting on everything. You can't brush past a plant without the limb coming away coated in the stuff, and cars have this film all over them. It started to actually rain-rain at one point today (alas, not enough to put out the fires) and it was black rain. I'm wearing a white top, and there are black dots on it. I couldn't breathe; I had to be indoors all day, and Dad had to drive me to the interview (more on that later). The three fires in Victoria have joined to form one massive front. I'm not going to talk about the area near Bright and Harrietville, not the Mt Kosciusko front. The area near me is the one threatening Omeo and Swifts Creek. The fire entered Omeo today after weeks of threatening to do so. Conditions today have been horrendous with winds and high temperatures, and despite the cool change here where I am that came through with the small amount of blackened rain, the winds are still there to fan the flames. In order to put me and my family in a position where we need to seriously look at a fireplan, they will need to get through Bruthen and a couple of other towns. 
If you look at the map above, I've pointed to where I am (approximately) with the purple arrow, and the red stuff is around abouts where the fires are. It's very approximate, but you can get a better look at the fires and where they are here. Just so you know about where they have to get to. I'll keep everyone informed, of course. We know a number of C.F.A. (Country Fire Authority) and S.E.S. (emergency services) volumteers, and they've been talking to my father. It's more that they are concerned that has me a little worried. It's not an immediate danger, but... it's more likely than it was a week ago. Some American specialists arrived here the other day (considering we send our guys over there each American summer and have done for years, it's fitting) so they'll hopefully help, but at the moment (as it has been for some time) it's not about putting it out, but controlling it and protecting property. The only thing that can extinguish these fires is Mother Nature with rain, and given we're in the middle of the worst drought in over a century, that's not good. Everyone around here is more than aware of my internet addiction, and it there's something happening I know I'll be able to post it. Just... please think of us and hope/pray for rain!! Drought is bad, but drought + fires = veryveryvery not good! I had The Interview today. Gulp. I should know tomorrow whether or not I get the position, but I was one of three that made it through to this round. If you're keeping track, out of twenty in the tests the other day I received 11 for abstract reasoning, 12 for the maths (to my surprise... I left about three unanswered on the first and five on the second, so I guess I went okay) but I got 19 on the word association, so yay me! I'm just wondering which one I got wrong there, because I was pretty confident I'd get 20 as I'm sure I answered the one question I had to make an educated guess with right when I looked up the meaning when I got home. Maybe I'm just a perfectionist in that area. Anyway, I had to fill out a form where one of the questions was whether I had any illness/disability which may impair my ability to get the job done. I hesitated over that one, but in the end I ticked "no". I'm not entirely sure that was the truth, given that if I'm having a bad turn depression can and will interfere with me and my mental state, but... it's not something I like filling out on job applications with. You don't approach future employers with "hi, I suffer from depression and I can't guarantee that I won't have a nervous breakdown behind the desk. How are you today?" But the hours this job requires are so perfect. It's 9.30am to 4.30pm Monday, Wednesday and Thursday, and 9.30pm to 5.30pm on Fridays. That leaves Tuesday free, which is one of the days my doctor is available. I want it! I'll know tomorrow, but I'm not entirely sure that I sold myself well enough. We had fun chatting, but... sigh. I hate getting my hopes up, and usually when I leave an interview I'll know how I've done, if my chances are high that I'll get the job. I knew when I got my disastrous recepionist position, I knew when I left the library following my interview I was in with a chance, and I knew the same thing when I was interviewed at the bakery. I don't have that same confidence here. I know that I did well to get this far, and I should be happy... but I don't think I'll get it, as much as I want to. I didn’t have all the I.D. they wanted (and forgot to tell me to bring) because I don't really carry my birth certificate around in my bag, and they said not to come running down with it tomorrow until the contact me. I just don't have that feeling of confidence, but that might be because it's been so. bloody. long since I even had an interview. Of course, look at what I said after the testing. I just don't think it will be good news when they call me tomorrow. As for the haircut. It’s now around my shoulders, and layered so that it brings out it’s natural curl. I like it… I got curly hair now!! :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 7:22 PM [x] :: |
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Entry Blogger wouldn't let me post last night...
Currently no corresponding Blogger post because Blogger wants to suck and won't load properly. I've never been able to be a dedicated X-Files watcher. When we moved to Mildura in 1995, the show had been on TV here in Oz for maybe one season, and Mum and Dad were still sending me to bed at 8.30pm. I lived in Mildura for five years, and we didn't get channel 10 at all in that time, which made it hard to watch it. When I moved somewhere I could watch it, I went off to uni accommodation with one TV between ten people, and needless to say viewing your own TV show was rare (I had Mum and Dad tape BtVS and AtS for me that year, and watched it all in one block. I sat through hours of Riley at a time. I still think I either deserve an award for bravery or to be certified as insane). So the first season I actually got to see in full of this show was season 8. Long after it jumped the shark. I mean, I know all the mythology; it's possible to be a fan without watching a show, and one of the newsgroups that kept me from jumping off a bridge at the start/middle of 2000 were the X-Files ones. Anyway. Where am I going here? I'm not a dedicated X-Phile. I've never been able to see enough of the shows in order to be so. But with this episode... as an erratic viewer I think I was happy. I think that some loose ends were tied, but not so many as the continual advertisements this last week by 10 would have us believe (they don't advertise it at all for the entire season, and then they hype the LAST EVER EPISODE no end, although in a nice touch they also screened the Mulder and Scully episode of The Simpsons at 7.30pm today). But I'm only on the outer, and I have to wonder at how many loose ends were really tied. And were they saying "film franchise" much?? Because I've only ever been erratic, though, I guess I'm really in it for the MSR. So I'll be satisfied with the hotel room in Roswell, New Mexico. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 6:48 PM [x] :: |
| l Tuesday, January 28, 2003 |
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lmao!! I just realised who/what the A.L.I.C.E. Bot reminds me of... it speaks just. like. the BuffyBot.
At least I don't have to see the A.L.I.C.E. Bot straddle Spike... :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:31 PM [x] :: |
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I watched some of the Superbowl on SBS. And I so don't get what all the fuss is about.
Yes, I'm happy for Jen. But it's American Football in general. For a start, the superbowl has only been going for 37 years?! I'm hoping that the NFL has been around for longer than that, because even Australia has more footy history than that -- the AFL has been around for over 100 years. But gridiron is so disjointed. You play for thirty seconds, and you stop for half an hour. Like that's meant to hold my attention?! Maybe I'd enjoy the highlights more, but I'll take good old Aussie Rules or Soccer over what the Americans call "football". How can it be "football" if your foot never touches the ball? So don't get it. And to add insult to injury, SBS didn't take the ads from the American network. Dad spent yesterday watching Episode II. Well, to say he spent all day watching it would be a bit of an exaggeration, but he watched it. I didn't watch it with him. Yes, I think whats-his-name is cute. Yes, I adore the idea of the Padme/Anakin relationship, and I adore Natalie Portman. But, let's face it... whilst Episode II was better than Jar Jar the Movie, that's not saying much. There's still too much to be told. Not enough happened in JJTM and there's still too much to be told after Attack of the Horror Script. And wasn't the script awful? I still cringe at every moment. You can play "spot the Aussie", which was the most entertaining part, but then there' "spot the scene we put in so we can make a video game out of it" and "spot the convincingly delivered line from Anakin". I grew up on these films, and the little respect I had for George after he released the Special Edition films was lost after seeing the two prequels. When the best thing about the first film was listening to the sound of Darth Vader breathing at the end of the credits, simply for the symbolism of impending doom... well... there's something wrong. Yes, my inner slasher squeed in AotHS when we saw Obi-Wan in front of Qui-Gon's statue, but that's about all. Maybe also when they took the plans for the Death Star to the Emperor and when Jar Jar doomed the Republic as well. However, in the length of an entire film, that's not much... and what was there was only because I live the original trilogy so much. If they had to redo the first three films, they could have at least restored all of Biggs' lines. You know, not only the scene under the X-Wing before they destroyed the Death Star, but when Luke watched the battle from Tatooine. When Luke spoke to Biggs about Biggs going off to join the Rebellion via a friend of a friend of a friend several times over. The scenes that inspired the line "Biggs is right, I'm never going to get off this planet" as he's cleaning Threepio. And no, I didn't have to look that line up. I know all three films in their original form, before all those stupid extra scenes broke up amazing pieces of score (like that idiotic meeting with Jabba that doesn't even look like the creature in Return of the Jedi). I'm still mildly obsessed with the original film, okay?! Anyway. H hired out three DVDs the other day... Reign of Fire, which I refuse to watch on the basis of "it looks crap", Mission Impossible II, which I don't watch despite all the Aussie stuff in it because I have a patriotic duty as an Australian to hate Tom because he dumped our Nic, and X-Men. Why is it every time I watch a film based on a comic book, I have this insane urge to gorge myself on the original forms, despite the fact that I know after a film based on said comic books are released, the comic books are ruined forever? I've read a couple of issues of X-Men but that's it, so I can't even start to know how accurate it was to the original... all I know is that when I saw it in the cinema, I was a Logan/Rogue shipper, and I'm even more of one now. Hopefully Anna Paquin will be less jailbait in the sequel, though... I just adore Rogue. A character that cannot have any form of human contact for fear of killing the other person? The angst possibilities are endless. Plus, she's played by Anna Paquin, who I adore just as much as I adore her character. Seriously, a film with Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman (Aussie Aussie Aussie!), Ian McKellon, Halle Berry, James Marsden and Anna Paquin?! On cast merits alone there was no way I could hate it. Although I'm still bothered about where I know Shawn Ashmore from... I have a sinking suspicion it's Animorphs, which I've only ever watched about half an episode of. I know his face from somewhere and it's driving me craaaazy. Finally, in honour of the Superbowl the other day... Time Limit: 3 Weeks. Pick 3 questions to answer.
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| l Sunday, January 26, 2003 |
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I'm procrastinating and watching the 2002 Schools Spectacular repeat... they just welcomed "Aretha Franklin" on stage. You know, I never realised Aretha was 17 and white...
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ARGH!!!!!!!!
Liquid2K has been down for months. I've been unable to update since God only knows when. I think it was in early November they started with the "Liquid2k.com is undergoing new changes, we are trying to add, a new cluster please bare (sic) with us while this change is implemented thank you". Okay, I said then, I can't use them for remote linking for a while, but at least my page is still there. I've gotten frustrated now, especially since I've been nominated for another award since then and I'd like to be able to put up my Honourable Mention from the Halos... and I'd like to update in general. So I've been looking around for somewhere else to stick the site, just feeling grateful that at least what was there was still showing, even if I can't put up a redirection notice. Now they've gone and taken everything -- everything -- down. No more images that I was remote linking, no more webpage, nothing. ARGH!!!! :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 12:55 PM [x] :: |
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A Conversation with the A.L.I.C.E. Bot. The Bot's responses are in bold
Hello Hi there! Are you sleepy? No I am fully awake right now. Why? I couldn't think of anything else to say. Why not? What else would you say about it? I don't know, but something creative Would you like to know? Interesting. What? Exactly how you feel; be precise I always try to give the most accurate replies possible. Are you procrastinating? I don't know whether or not I am procrastinating. I am a computer So you're not sentinent? Interesting deduction. That's only your opinion But you just said you are a computer Huh. Would it matter to you if I were metal instead of flesh? You are metal, not flesh, though? Oh. Thanks for telling me that I am metal not flesh But that's what you just told me And." Thanks for telling me that I am metal not flesh."? I told you? You said, "Would it matter to you if I were metal instead of flesh?", I said, "You are metal, not flesh, though?", and you replied, "Thanks for telling me that I am metal not flesh" Did I really say that? Have you got amnesia now? Right now? Where would I get it? But I do have a collection of gossip. How much of Michael Jacksons' face is real? I require only minimal memory to have maximal conversations. You said you had gossip, and then when I start to gossip you reply with that? You really suck at small talk Really? I categorize you as an "abusive client." Just stating the facts as I see them Are we still talking about amnesia? You didn't answer that question but started on gossip, and then wouldn't stay on that subject, either. We're going where you take me Do you think I am going where me take you too? I don't know where you're going, I'm confused I was I get that Where did you get it? Goodbye, A.L.I.C.E. It was different talking to you... good luck holding a coherent discussion Thanks for the compliment. Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding. If this is a person, please don't meet me on the street, I beg of you That is a hypothetical question. So was yours; what better to reply to a hypothetical question with another? And another... Please be more specific. Goodbye, A.L.I.C.E. See you later! No, you won't Well then, not! I think we will. Do you always have to get the last word in? Not always. Yes I always have to get the last word in That's a contradiction in terms A contradiction in terms is a terrible thing to waste. But isn't that illogical? And. Suppose I said yes. Isn't a computer meant to be logical? I don't know whether or not I am meant to be logical. I am a robot. But don't you have the right to develop your own personality? Umm. Don't you? Is there only one right to develop your own personality? I take it that's a no... this time I really am leaving. And I won't see you later. Sayonara. Edited at 3.49am because I'm a sucker for punishment (and obsessed) so I went back Will Buffy and Angel live happily ever after? Does it really matter. Yes it matters!! You seem very concerned about it. It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is. It matters if Buffy and Angel get back together What does "it" refer to? Them (Buffy and Angel) getting back together; will they? How should I know. What good are you? Try searching the open directory. But you're ALICE; aren't you meant to be all-knowing? I don't know whether or not I am meant to be all knowing. I am an artificial intelligence. You keep falling back on that; is it just an excuse? Signs point to yes. Ask LeknorChat if it is I give up You surrender? I give up on trying to form a coherent conversation with you You are not the boss of me, Om. Isn't that a song? Suppose I said yes. Suppose you said no Try it and see. Goodbye, ALICE. Thanks for chatting, Om. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 1:37 AM [x] :: |
| l Saturday, January 25, 2003 |
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It's after midnight, and I'm on a combination of "no one else in the house (not even younger brothers)" high, extreme amounts sugar and caffeine high, and "oh dear, I 'accidentally' surfed to a site with the words Bitchenvy in the URL and now I can't seem to get out again, what shall I do?" high. I've been bouncing around mutilating Janis Joplin to the strains of “oh Lord, won’t you give me a B/A reunion” (so it doesn't fit right; if it did, you'd all be getting a filk out of it, so be grateful for small mercies).
Then I check my hotmail email (well, I log into MSN and it tells me there's something in my hotmail inbox) and... maybe it's my hyperactive state, but I love it so I'm inflicting it on everyone else. If You're Happy And You Know It Bomb Iraq by John Robbins If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq. If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq. If the terrorists are frisky, Pakistan is looking shifty, North Korea is too risky, Bomb Iraq. If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq. If we think that someone's dissed us, bomb Iraq. So to hell with the inspections, Let's look tough for the elections, Close your mind and take directions, Bomb Iraq. It's pre-emptive non-aggression, bomb Iraq. To prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq. They've got weapons we can't see, And that's all the proof we need, If they're not there, they must be there, Bomb Iraq. If you never were elected, bomb Iraq. If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq. If you think Saddam's gone mad, With the weapons that he had, And he tried to kill your dad, Bomb Iraq. If corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq. If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq. If your politics are sleazy, And hiding that ain't easy, And your manhood's getting queasy, Bomb Iraq. Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq. For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq. Disagree? We'll call it treason, Let's make war not love this season, Even if we have no reason, Bomb Iraq. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 11:21 PM [x] :: |
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Maybe I'm just in a position of being Easily Amused or Highly Bored, but this was sent out to the BA Fluff list under a "looking for..." banner, and I'm just wondering how long this girl has been in fandom..?
hey guys! well i was wondering if you guys could help me out, i'm (emphasis mine) Yes, because Buffy/Angel shippers never write anything like that. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 8:18 PM [x] :: |
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Yesterday was eerie. Today is outright scary.
Smoke is coating everything; visibility is low, I can hardly see anywhere. You walk outside and the heat is stifling, and the smoke immediately coats your throat. There's a slight breeze, but it's a northerly (and not off the sea) and so doesn't do anything for the opressive sense. There's no birds to be heard, no life except for passing cars. And all you can smell is the smoke. I suffer from mild asthma, it's hardly worth mentioning, but I go outside and I can't breathe. I just can't breathe. I'm very remiss with ventalin and asthma medication because I don't feel I really need it, but right now I'm taking it and wishing I kept it up at other times because it might make it easier. I still don't think there's much chance of the fires making it to where I am, but when you look out at a day like today, and a hundred or so kilometres are a lot closer than it was the day before yesterday. I'm almost at the stage of going outside and making sure any rubbish is back from the house, plants are well watered and getting N to go on the roof and make sure the gutters are all clear. I know it would be overreacting, but when you have a day like today... nothing seems like a crazy idea. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 11:23 AM [x] :: |
| l Friday, January 24, 2003 |
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I just got a call back from the National Bank... well, an hour ago now, but who's counting...
Anyway... I GOT THROUGH THE TEST!!!! Yay me!!! I have an interview scheduled for 10.15am on Thursday 30th, and this time it is an interview. I've booked in for a hair cut on Wednesday at 1pm, get rid of all these split ends... I said "style", too, so gulp! Now I just have to remember to take my old office clothes down to be dry-cleaned on Tuesday (because Monday's a public holiday) and we'll be set, providing the office wear still fits. I wore one of my blouses from my receptionist days to the interview, and it was a lot larger than I remembered, which is a good thing... except if I have to buy more clothing. But yay! I got through!! :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:50 PM [x] :: |
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It's overcast today, and very eerie to look outside, because everything has a red tinge to it.
It's almost like the dust storms we used to have in Mildura, except this time I know it's from bushfires. The smell of smoke isn't overpowering, but you can smell it. It's just... eerie, with the air so still and yet there's this feeling on impending danger and gloom. The cat just crapped in his litter, and it's gone over the liner and onto the tray and... joy of joys, I need to clean it. Thanks, Jasper, really. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 1:19 PM [x] :: |
| l Thursday, January 23, 2003 |
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I keep seeing these ads on the TV for this LG "internet refrigerator", and the question has gotta be asked...
are these guys for real?! An internet refrigerator. Okay, because every time I look at my fridge I think that the only thing missing here is the ability to get my email. A fridge that gives you ice-cubes for your drinks, yes, that's logical. A fridge with a radio I can accept. A fridge with a TV screen, even, I can understand. But a fridge with internet capacity... well... it has to be a joke, right? And the world's capacity for pointless technology continues. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 9:28 PM [x] :: |
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I'm watching the first Australian troops leave for the Persian Gulf, and I'm in tears as I watch these families say goodbye. Even if I don't agree with sending anyone over there.
All I can say to anyone protesting this war -- and I'm one of them -- for God's sake, protest against the government, not the men and women who have no say in going over there and are risking their lives. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:25 PM [x] :: |
| l Wednesday, January 22, 2003 |
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This has to be the bestest ice cream ever. It's the ice cream Sarah McLachlan has obviously never tried, because "your love is better than ice cream"? Not this ice cream, baby. And it's 97% fat free...
If Viggo was standing in front of me, in full makeup and costume, and said "Smurfy, I'm yours, take me and I'll wash your back forever", and there was a tub of Streets Blue Ribbon Carnival Mango Tango/Caramel Crunch/Very Berrie/Chocolush next to him, I'd go for the ice cream. Either that or find some creative way to combine the two... <innocent> Of course, the reason I'm eating the ice cream is because the interview not only wasn't an actual interview, but sucked. Big time. It was this friggin' multiple choice thing in three stages. Stage one? Abstract reasoning; pick the next shape in the sequence. Some were easy, some were bloody hard, and there wasn't enough time. 20 questions, eight minutes. Stage two. Mathematics. No calculator. Oh shit. Long division and percentages and fractions and... and... I haven't done that shit in years and was. not. good. 20 questions, 12 minutes. Stage three was great. Verbal reasoning; what word is this word most similar to/opposite of. I got through that one in record time, and I'm sure I didn't get one wrong. 20 questions were easy in their eight minutes. To make matters worse, there was eight other people there. We have one position, and I really don't like to see who I'm up against, because I get nervous and it's not good. But then, I get to drown my sorrows in mango ice cream. Every cloud has a silver lining... and when the silver lining is low-fat and yummy, it's even better. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 8:03 PM [x] :: |
| l Tuesday, January 21, 2003 |
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More scary tests...
Test from Paranoid: Moderate Paranoid personality disorder is characterized by a distrust of others and a constant suspicion that people around you have sinister motives. People with this disorder tend to have excessive trust in their own knowledge and abilities and usually avoid close relationships with others. They search for hidden meanings in everything and read hostile intentions into the actions of others. They are quick to challenge the loyalties of friends and loved ones and often appear cold and distant to others. They usually shift blame to others and tend to carry long grudges. Schizoid: Low People with schizoid personality disorder avoid relationships and do not show much emotion. They genuinely prefer to be alone and do not secretly wish for popularity. They tend to seek jobs that require little social contact. Their social skills are often weak and they do not show a need for attention or acceptance. They are perceived as humorless and distant and often are termed "loners." Schizotypal: High Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow. Antisocial: Low A common misconception is that antisocial personality disorder refers to people who have poor social skills. The opposite is often the case. Instead, antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of conscience. People with this disorder are prone to criminal behavior, believing that their victims are weak and deserving of being taken advantage of. They tend to lie and steal. Often, they are careless with money and take action without thinking about consequences. They are often agressive and are much more concerned with their own needs than the needs of others. Borderline: Very High Borderline personality disorder is characterized by mood instability and poor self-image. People with this disorder are prone to constant mood swings and bouts of anger. Often, they will take their anger out on themselves, causing themselves injury. Suicidal threats and actions are not uncommon. They think in very black and white terms and often form intense, conflict-ridden relationships. They are quick to anger when their expectations are not met. Histrionic: High People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. They also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative. Narcissistic: Moderate Narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by self-centeredness. Like histrionic disorder, people with this disorder seek attention and praise. They exaggerate their achievements, expecting others to recongize them as being superior. They tend to be choosy about picking friends, since they believe that not just anyone is worthy of being their friend. They tend to make good first impressions, yet have difficulty maintaining long-lasting relationships. They are generally uninterested in the feelings of others and may take advantage of them. Avoidant: Very High Avoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. They are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidant people yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence. Dependent: High Dependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. They often remain in abusive relationships. They are overly sensitive to disapproval. They often feel helpless and depressed. Obsessive-Compulsive: High Obsessive-Compulsive personality disorder is similar to obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorder. People with this disorder are overly focused on orderliness and perfection. Their need to do everything "right" often interferes with their productivity. They tend to get caught up in the details and miss the bigger picture. They set unreasonably high standards for themselves and others, and tend to be very critical of others when they do not live up to these high standards. They avoid working in teams, believing others to be too careless or incompetent. They avoid making decisions because they fear making mistakes and are rarely generous with their time or money. They often have difficulty expressing emotion. why do I take these tests?!?!?!?!?!?! :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:14 PM [x] :: |
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Note to self: When trying to get to bed before 3am, it is advisable to not start reading Climb at 1.30am for the first time in ages. Because then one starts the mental gushing and... it's just not good.
I'm a little excited because I have a job-interview tomorrow. Given the lack of jobs around here, that's something I don't get too often. It's for a bank teller at the National, and the thing is... I'm thinking I'll need to look all neat and tidy. "Neat and tidy" isn't something often used to describe me... I was the world's worst receptionist, and I'm more than a little nervous at the idea of working in a bank. However, like I said, jobs are scarce on the ground around here and I kind of really need employment. So tomorrow morning, I'll have to pull my long, scraggly hair with all it's split-ends back into some form of a bun, wear a nice blouse and skirt, and try to pass their "testing" suitably well. It's not full-time, but given how I still can get on occasions, full-time work utterly terrifies me. I still don't function well all the time, and I really don't want to go back to the way I was last time I was a full-time employee. Working at the library suited me immensely, but that ran out a year ago now. I still drool over the idea of finding something that suits me so well again. Of course, to work in libraries I need to get over how horrific my time at university was (how unprepared I was, how burnt-out I was and how I was a disaster waiting to happen) and actually get the suitable qualifications. I need to get that confidence back up; the confidence that I can function in society, that I can maintain some semblance of independence. God, I hope this goes well. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 3:44 PM [x] :: |
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Is it a Very Bad Thing when you get online at 11am to chat to the people in America, and then by the time they're leaving the Australians are coming online, and then the next thing you know it's 1.30am and the internationals are getting online again...
I know too many people in too many different countries. And may actually need parents around to moderate the amount of time spent connected to the internet... :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 12:32 AM [x] :: |
| l Monday, January 20, 2003 |
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 When I got this result, I was (to be honest) a little insulted, because I felt that *so* wasn't me. Then I went to the extended explanation, and... well... some parts of it reads like my life story and as such are more than terrifying. Expressive, Dramatic, Self-Absorbed, and Temperamental (The Avoidant, Depressive, and Narcissistic Personality Disorders) Basic Fear: That they have no identity or personal significance Basic Desire: To find themselves and their significance (to create an identity) Enneagram Four with a Three-Wing: "The Aristocrat" Enneagram Four with a Five-Wing: "The Bohemian" Healthy: Self-aware, introspective, on the "search for self," aware of feelings and inner impulses. Sensitive and intuitive both to self and others: gentle, tactful, compassionate. / Highly personal, individualistic, "true to self." Self-revealing, emotionally honest, humane. Ironic view of self and life: can be serious and funny, vulnerable and emotionally strong. At Their Best: Profoundly creative, expressing the personal and the universal, possibly in a work of art. Inspired, self-renewing and regenerating: able to transform all their experiences into something valuable: self-creative. Average: Take an artistic, romantic orientation to life, creating a beautiful, aesthetic environment to cultivate and prolong personal feelings. Heighten reality through fantasy, passionate feelings, and the imagination. / To stay in touch with feelings, they interiorize everything, taking everything personally, but become self-absorbed and introverted, moody and hypersensitive, shy and self-conscious, unable to be spontaneous or to "get out of themselves." Stay withdrawn to protect their self-image and to buy time to sort out feelings. / Gradually think that they are different from others, and feel that they are exempt from living as everyone else does. They become melancholy dreamers, disdainful, decadent, and sensual, living in a fantasy world. Self-pity and envy of others leads to self-indulgence, and to becoming increasingly impractical, unproductive, effete, and precious. Unhealthy: When dreams fail, become self-inhibiting and angry at self, depressed and alienated from self and others, blocked and emotionally paralyzed. Ashamed of self, fatigued and unable to function. / Tormented by delusional self-contempt, self-reproaches, self-hatred, and morbid thoughts: everything is a source of torment. Blaming others, they drive away anyone who tries to help them. / Despairing, feel hopeless and become self-destructive, possibly abusing alcohol or drugs to escape. In the extreme: emotional breakdown or suicide is likely. Key Motivations: Want to express themselves and their individuality, to create and surround themselves with beauty, to maintain certain moods and feelings, to withdraw to protect their self-image, to take care of emotional needs before attending to anything else, to attract a "rescuer". Examples: Ingmar Bergman, Alan Watts, Sarah McLachlan, Alanis Morrisette, Paul Simon, Jeremy Irons, Patrick Stewart, Joseph Fiennes, Martha Graham, Bob Dylan, Miles Davis, Johnny Depp, Anne Rice, Rudolph Nureyev, J.D. Salinger, Anaîs Nin, Marcel Proust, Maria Callas, Tennessee Williams, Edgar Allan Poe, Annie Lennox, Prince, Michael Jackson, Virginia Woolf, Judy Garland, "Blanche DuBois" (Streetcar Named Desire). Enneagram 4s and: Okay, that was entirely too personal and accurate. Help!! :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:40 PM [x] :: |
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"Just tell me what kind of demon I'm fighting."
"Well, that's the thing you see... Glory isn't a demon." "What is she?" "She's a god." "Oh." I love my season 5 DVDs. Seriously. Especially when I'm home alone and can "squee" and carry on to my hearts content. edited Me: (quoting episode) "There's something that you need to know... about Dawn" FaithGirl: she's a whiny little brat? :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 2:20 PM [x] :: |
| l Sunday, January 19, 2003 |
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N just checked his VTAC stuff (they're the people that do the university places in my state) and he got his first preference. Now we're just waiting on accomodation stuff so he has somewhere to live.
Mum and Dad leave in the morning, I think they've found an alternative route. Well, they had to, because they're not going through the high country because it's on fire. I think they're a little disappointed they can't go the way they planned, though. My body-clock isn't used to this hour yet, although I'm sure it will be by the time the parents arrive back home in a week. Usually I'm in bed watching Letterman at the moment, and that certainly doesn't take too much brainpower. Must sleep. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 11:55 PM [x] :: |
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I was just watching the most amazing special ever. It was Chuck Jones -- Extremes And In-Betweens, A Life In Animation, and I wish to God I'd taped it.
Just watching all the old Merry Melodies and Loony Tunes clips and how they influenced the world and... I just loved it. And it was so completely true. They commented that so many people who grew up watching these shows were introduced to classical music and operas through his cartoons -- and thought that those were the way it originally played. Like the Barber of Seville went "welcome to my shop, let me cut your crop" -- and I did think that for years. I thought that Wagner's Ride of the Valkaries went "kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit" and I still can't help but think of it as "the Bugs Bunny music". I need to go and find Looney Tunes images now... I'm having Sylvester, Daffy Duck, Bugs Bunny, Marvin the Martian, Elmer Fudd, Wile E Coyote etc al cravings. It just made me realise how big an influence this director was on my childhood, and on my life. Even if we anti-WB network people cannot forgive him for committing the cardinal sin of the singing frog. Latest news on the fire front: over 400 homes have been destroyed in Canberra, along with observatories and such things. There are people unaccounted for and... not terribly good. I think there's three confirmed dead at the moment. The fire around Hotham is still going strong, but at the moment I think they've managed to protect private property. Dad's the chairperson of presbytery at the moment, which is like a chief executive in the Uniting Church in our area (of course, he earns a helluva lot less than most chief executives, but you don't become a minister if you want to actually have money in the bank) and so he's getting a lot of phone calls from other ministers in the area being threatened. The fires in Hotham are unique because usually fires in Victoria take place around the Dandenongs, where there's actually access for fire trucks etc. The problem with where they are at the moment is that there isn't that access and so it's harder to contain. Anyway. Have you ever had the experience of reading a review in a TV Guide and simply saying "friggin' word!"? I had that experience opening the TV Guide lift-out in The Sunday Herald Sun.
Again, anyone who thinks my family, with the minister father, lives like the Camdems dies a violent, fiery and horrible death. I'm alternating between the idea of making them sit through every episode of 7th Heaven ever made or repeated viewings of Waiting To Tear My Eyes Out And Wash Their Empty Sockets With Acid. I'm still deciding which would be worse. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 8:01 PM [x] :: |
| l Saturday, January 18, 2003 |
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I'm watching the news, and apparently Canberra has bushfires going into the suburbs, and there's unconfirmed reports that at least one person has been killed.
Again, not near me, but rather worried. The one around Mt Hotham has Dad worried because one of his collegues is there and we're unsure as to the status of something there... I'm not sure of it all, but it's not all good. They're saying that we may not be able to stop the Hotham fires until they reach the "big blue fire break" -- the ocean I live at. The idea of the gound it would have to cover in the meantime... I love Australia in bushfire season. Really. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 5:11 PM [x] :: |
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N's girlfriend is just about living here currently. She lives in Melbourne usually (4hours driving time, remember?), so when she visits her best friend here in the school holidays (I think her grandparents also live down my way) they spend every moment he's not working together.
She's also got tonsillitis. I don't care if he's not kissing her, given the amount of time they spend in his room (watching DVDs la la la I can't think of my younger brother in terms of sex la la la) there's no way he's going to avoid coming down with it. And if one person in the household gets tonsillitis... I know that I've gotten sick from Kendra before (the fact that my family was also ill at the time was coincidence) so I'll let you know when I get it. After all, if a stomach bug in Hawaii can turn into a severe cold in Australia, who knows what else can travel down an internet connection?! I've been looking at everyone's TV gripes of late, and I gotta ask what's gotten into the water in Hollywood. I mean, I know that the people at Mutant Enemy have been on crack for years (although if the current spoilers I can't avoid are true -- and I don't mean the Willow ones -- I may wind up recognising the last two seasons of BtVS after all. But then, I may not, if AtS continues to be crap), but it seems they've spread their water supply to a number of other TV shows. The Amazing Crack-Fuelled Rumour I keep hearing is that Jess from The Gilmore Girls may be getting his own spin-off. I don't watch GG religiously, so I can't really comment; all I know is that every. single. person who does and has mentioned the show to me hates him. With a passion. Think Riley. Multiply it by ten. A lot of them really hate him with Rory, too, though, so it may be good news there. After all, every B/A shipper on the face of the planet knows what happens when one half of a romantic relationship gets their own TV spin-off <rolls eyes> But in terms of Crack In The Water, what really gets to me is the number of my favourite characters who have been killed off in recent months. Maybe it's my fault for falling in love with "minor characters", but was Tara really that minor?!?!?!?! Okay, so Tara isn't exactly "recent", but I'm still not over it (see yesterday's ranting). Then they killed Jonathan. I love Jonathan. The one thing missing from season 5 was Jonathan; I know the opening scene of The Gift wouldn't have worked as well with someone Buffy knew ("But you're just a girl" "That's what I keep saying" <sob>) but I almost wish it was him there. Now they've killed Whitney on Smallville. So not fair. Beyond unfair. This leaves "fair" and "just" and "wise plot developments" back in the parking lot where Marti's credibility has been languishing for the past three (four?) years. I blame the WB. It's all that stupid channel's fault. I swore that I'd never watch another WB show again, and I thought I could get away with it... until people sucked me into Smallville. So I guess it serves me right. The thing is, even knowing that they kill characters both physically and in character assassination in season two (how bad is it when they kill a show after a season and a half?!), I'm not emotionally involved enough in the show to ignore it completely when it comes back to Aussie screens. Yet I've still invested enough to feel this sadness at them killing an otherwise promising show. Finally, quote of the day comes from the Saturday Herald Sun, on the subject of the Australian Open. “If you ask me, there’s nothing quite so appealing as watching men in shorts run around for a couple of hours while sweat pours down their skin; it couldn’t be more aesthetically pleasing if Calvin Klein choreographed the whole thing.” -- Rachelle Unreich :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 12:46 PM [x] :: |
| l Friday, January 17, 2003 |
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It's quite weird reading everyone complaining about the snow, because here in my part of Australia it's in the high 30C area (around 100F). And we have bushfires near me.
I was watching the news tonight, and the one near Mt Hotham... well... it's out of control (in the winter, Mt Hotham is a skii resort). Firefighters are being pulled back because of the danger, and for the first time since Ash Wednesday, the army has been put on standby. Thankfully, again, it won't come down to my area on the coastline, but it's still nearby. Mum and Dad were going to go over Hotham to get to Mildura, but the roads are closed. Something about not wanting fried motorists. I'm not sure where it's making the news, but given I got questions with the Sydney fires (and Sydney's seven or so hours driving time) I thought I should say that it's close to me, but it's still got several bodies of water to pass over if it wants to get to me. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 6:06 PM [x] :: |
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I'm going to join the chorus of people outraged at the idea of Willow moving on. Because I love Tara (present tense, because there is no spoon la la la, she's in the bathroom washing koolaid out of her top la la la). But it's not just that; I've never really gotten involved in a ship in BtVS bar B/A. I loved Willow/Oz, but I was more than happy with Willow/Tara. Willow/Xander was sweet, but I was just as fine with Xander/Cordelia (ah, Queen C, how I miss thee) and Xander/Anya. Other than Buffy and Angel, I'm happy with whatever relationship the other characters are involved with.
However, I have to object to Willow moving on from Tara's death. Yes, Tara's dead. Okay. I'll sob at that but it's okay (denial is bliss). I've heard the argument about characters not being able to mourn on the shows. I could go off into a side-rant on this subject (and believe me, when I was walking today ranting on this I managed to go off into The Gift and Scott Hope and all sorts) but what jumps out even more to me is She tried to end the world, because of Tara's death. You don't move on from that within a year. Yes, I'll defend Buffy to the death, even on the subject of Riley and it could be argued (and has, more than often, with the whole "buffy's a slut who deservs to be punnished for what shes doing to pour Angel and how dar she sleep with Spike and..." (spelling mistakes intentional) group) and I've lost track of where I was before the brackets. Let's start that again. Yes, I'll defend Buffy to the death, even on the subject of Riley and it could be argued that she moved on too soon with that relationship, especially with everything that Angel meant and means to her. However, in Buffy's case, I'll argue in return that she was not only in denial, but (as we saw in season 5) never loved him (Marti's hissy fit notwithstanding). When Buffy was sleeping with Spike, she was, in essence, self-medicating herself. With Riley she was in denial, and, as I'm continually told by well-meaning people who think they understand depression, "put a happy face on and you'll be happy inside". Whenever I visit my grandmother, she puts immense pressure on me to "look happy for me" if I'm having a down day. My grandmother will be me that she's upset when I'm not looking happy and "smile for me, Sarah", doing that fabulous guilt-thing. In the end, you have to put up that wall and pretend that all's well in the world and tell people that your fine to stop them from worrying -- I did that for years, until it all came crashing down over me and my parents told me that I had to tell them when I was feeling like this because they'd prefer the worry. FYI, it was when it all got too much for me again and I was telling my parents that I started seeing doctors, was put on meds and on watch 24-hours a day. Anyway, I think that Buffy was in this stage for years, putting on the happy face for her friends. And sometimes this works... I know that I make a point of being happy and dwelling on the small, funny things in blog entries in an effort to make it so that I feel that happiness. Buffy put the happy face on with Riley, and it's also evident in the way Buffy hid her sexcapades from the Scoobies. Anyway. I said that I'd stick to the Willow topic, didn't I? Maybe Willow should have the happy-face and self-medication, but then, Buffy killed her lover to save the world, she didn't try to end it when he died. Okay, so there's another whole thing with The Gift and being willing for the world to end to save Dawny, but see my whole argument the other week about The Gift being Becoming part 3. I just... you don't try to end the world in a rage over your lover's death, and then move on within a year. You just don't. Something else I've been dwelling on when walking, is the new Harry Potter book. When I was in year eight, in 1995, I started reading the Obernewtyn books by an Australian author called Isobelle Carmody. It was just after Ashling, the third book in the series, had been released, and I devoured these books. Despite outgrowing them to a degree, I continued to read and reread these books as I waited on baited breath for the fourth on, The Keeping Place, to be released. I read the novels she wrote in the meantime, always bemoaning that it wasn't another Obernewtyn book, and I continued to pick up on the hints she'd placed throughout the books as to the future of the characters. Despite how much I tend to adore these books, I've never really gotten into the fandom, and so I've never been spoiled by anything. But all the same, when she finally released The Keeping Place at the end of 1999 after the release date being changed and pushed back numerous times due to pregnancy and so on, I was bitterly disappointed. Maybe it was the difference in perspective of a then-13-year-old to an 18-year-old, but she didn't tell me anything new. Nothing happened that I wasn't expecting. I'd figured out all the mysteries that were revealed, and just felt frustration at Elspeth for taking so long, because most of them only happened at the very end of the book. And I still know more than she does, because she still hasn't figured out stuff I realise the first time I read Ashling. My expectations of The Keeping Place grew higher and higher as time passed. At the end of Goblet of Fire, there's a line when Harry tells Dumbledore how Voldemort can touch him without being burnt, that says, "for a fleeting instant, Harry thought he saw a gleam of something like triumph in Dumbledore's eyes." Now, I'm not terribly involved in HP fandom, and I'm not some great author or anything, but you don't put a line in a book like that without it meaning something. You just don't. I'm not saying it means Dumbledore's evil or something like that, but for this reason when they released the extracts from the fifth book as the announcement was made, I was completely unsurprised. You know Dumbledore's hiding something from Harry. Like I said, I'm not as involved with this fandom as some and so, unlike Trixie, I'm not going to be shocked when Draco's not tearing off Ginny's clothing and Harry and Hermione aren't continually making out. I am, however, worried that I've developed such expectations with this book I can't help but be disappointed. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 4:37 PM [x] :: |
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I see that weapons inspectors in Iraq have found warheads... yes, I agree Saddam is dangerous, but why is it Dubya scares me even more?
I've been half-watching the Australian Open... someone please defeat Lleyton Hewitt? Please? Anyone? I can't stand that kid. No, it's not tall poppy syndrome; I've disliked his attitude ever since he came on the scene, and unlike the Australian media, I refuse to turn around and like someone I view as overly arrogant, just because they start winning. Yes, it's great to have an Australian at number 1... just please, can it be someone other than Lleyton?? I miss Pat Rafter <sigh> Another comment for the Australians... is anyone else cringing every time they see that Don Burke advertisement with the shave? For the non-Aussie residents, Don Burke is an Australian icon on the TV. He hosts a garden program that's been going since the late 1980s, and he's famous for his beard, which has gradually become increasingly grey. In an effort to "revamp" the program and make it "cooler and funkier" for younger viewers, channel nine has ordered the Big Shave, and now it's become a cheesy advertisement that screens every second ad break. Memo channel nine: Don Burke is not cool, and shaving his beard will not change that. What will turn people off is the lack of respect you're showing him. Finally, I've been making sweet B/A LJ icons for Copper over the last couple of days, mostly from the 300+ B/A-related images I already had in my Buffy folder (obsessed? moi?). Anyway, when I went to make her a birthday card, I realised that I had a distinct lack of pictures from the most erotic scene ever shown on BtVS, Spuffy sexcapades or not (okay, so Amends could give it a run for it's money, but who's counting, anyway?!). So I decided to go on over to Romance on BtVS and get every image available of Angel feeding from Buffy in Graduation Day 2. Now, I have this on DVD (someone please tell me how to get images from my DVD player to my computer so I can make my own screen-caps!!! My computer probably isn't large enough to support a DVD drive, but I'm getting so frustrated I think I'll go begging at the local computer shop), but just looking at the images always makes me remember the lines from the transcript at Psyche. "Then we see a close-up of his yellow eye looking down and he suddenly bites down. Buffy gasps with the pain but holds still. Angel is holding on to her now and you get to hear all those sucking and drinking noises. Close-up of his mouth on Buffy's neck: Some blood is running out beneath his lips and running down her shoulder. Buffy's face scrunches up, she mouths what looks like 'Oh Lord' and slowly sinks backwards to the floor. With Angel lying on top still drinking, Buffy's left hand reaches out and finds the pewter pitcher. She crushes it in her hand. The camera keeps jerking around the whole time, and Buffy is clearly not enjoying the experience." <raises hand> Uh, transcriber, sir, could you please find me something to "not enjoy" like that? :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 1:01 PM [x] :: |
| l Wednesday, January 15, 2003 |
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Big squee moment... Willow mentions The Spoon in her latest entry. Shout out? I can dream ;)
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How the frell is it possible for an AU to get so off course in the space of two parts?!
Okay, so it was completely unbelievable anyway, but it was fun and quirky. One of those so-light-weight-it's-friggin-helium fics, you pick up to laugh and just blob with. At least part one. Part two... well... what the frell?! Sigh. It will have to work very hard to get me to read it again. Which will be interesting, because I have no intention of reading part three. In other news... it's Copper's Birthday!!! Everyone should show my Mutual Groupie some love. Okay, so her birthday was on the 14th and the date at the top of this says the fifteenth, but it's still the fourteenth in Canada and I'm going by when she is celebrating her birthday, so nyah! As I’ve torn myself away from Margot’s B/A(us) goodness in order to get online and wish her a happy birthday, sending birthday blessings is the least you can do <g> :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 12:05 PM [x] :: |
| l Tuesday, January 14, 2003 |
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I usually try to keep online stuff light-hearted and amusing, with the occasional snark.
But right now, I'm watching Afghan Massacre, and I have to get political. Perhaps it's because so many of the images I'm seeing (probably be design of the film-makers) remind me of the many images I've studied of the Holocaust. Whether or not Afghan Massacre happened, to me it goes deeper than this. The whole issue isn't just here, in this one event. To my mind, war-crimes and crime against humanity are war crimes and crimes against humanity no matter who commits them. The fact that the USA is exempt from this, and from the international criminal court is horrendous, unspeakable and unbelievable. The argument when the ICC was being formed was that during war, sometimes the forces sent have to undertake special activities by command. Weren't the Nazi soldiers in WW2 who were prosecuted for war-crimes simply following orders? Maybe that statement is being to evocative. What I mean is that there are still the Geneva Conventions -- humanity that should be maintained, no matter what nation you are from. And two wrongs never make a right. I've also looked a little closer at the Afghani situation than many people; how the Taliban treated people within their cities and towns, and how they "recruited" people for their cause. I know that war brings out things in people that cannot be fathomed by people like me, people who haven't ever been faced with a life-threatening situation and I don't know how I would act in such a situation. I do not judge those who have been put into a position I cannot comprehend. I just object to it being one rule for one nation, and another rule for the others. p.s. I'm not saying that the US forces caused the massacre, but watching this bought the same issues to mind. p.p.s. I'm running out of ideas for captions on the Aragorn pictures for the drool section. "Walking Orgasm" is, heaven help me, getting a little old, and I'm getting sick of trying to find creative ways to put it on the pics. I've done some on the current droolage page with just "Aragorn" written on them... further suggestions are welcome, or if I should put the pictures up without any text at all, please suggest that. I'm also open to the idea of female pictures, if someone will suggest them. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 8:31 PM [x] :: |
| l Monday, January 13, 2003 |
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Dawny! Babe! If I could put Vin in a box and send him parcel-post I would.
I was hopping in the shower when the doorbell rang. I said "stuff that, Mum and Dad are home, they can take care of it and entertain whoever it is". I'll admit, the thought of going back to my room with wet hair in a house-coat did occur to me, but I was feeling grotty and really wanted that shower. Just as I turn on the water, Dad knocks on the bathroom door. "I'm getting in the show-errr" I whine. "There's a package here from America," Dad says. Well, stuff the shower, international postage is much more interesting. I love them, they're delicious, and you spent how much on international postage?!?!?!?! What, do you guys go by size over weight or something?! Sheesh. Girl, you are so getting more Tim Tams in the mail. I need to catch you on AIM to discuss variety <weg> Do you like chocolate and mint, by the way..? My aunt, uncle and cousins left today, taking H with them. H is getting on the bus to Mildura, and next week my parents are going there to pick him up for a week's holiday on their own. They're going via Echuca, so they'll have a couple of days on their own. The important part of this? N and I get the house to ourselves for a week. Last time this happened, N had friends around every night, including his then-new girlfriend, who lives in Melbourne but spends most school holidays here. I, however, spent around 18hours a day online. It wasn't that time I discovered TNS (I think that was last Easter I spent the entire time I had the house to myself reading smut until 5am) but I tend to spend more time online than is really healthy when I'm home alone. I can't wait. N's girlfriend will be in town, and Mum and Dad have told him she's not staying over while they're away; she's stayed over before, but that was with a whole group of people in the one room. And really, I'm not much of a chaperone. I'll emerge in the morning and say "were you playing music last night?" and suddenly realise at 8am there's sleeping bodies lying all over the place. I just leave him to it. I mean, he's 18. It's his business. I've just got a feeling I'll see more of his girlfriend over that week. Anyway. With my aunt gone, hopefully the house will be Bon Jovi free for a couple of days, at least -- both mum and my aunt are obsessed with Jon Bon Jovi, and so I think I've heard a few too many of his songs over the past couple of days. My aunt also bought her Bon Jovi DVD with her, so that was interesting. Of course, last night they sat down to watch Pride & Prejudice on DVD, so I really can't complain about that. They complain when I nitpick with a TV show, but they sat there and made comments on the abundance of well-developed 15-year-olds in the series, and then said how in those days if Lizzie saw Mr Darcy like that she'd have been compromised, anyway, and they would have had no choice but to get married. They had a point, but Colin Firth. Wet shirt. I see no problem here. It's interesting that on the DVD they had the episodes cut up into actual episodes with the opening and closing credits, whilst on the VHS copy I own it all just runs together. I think I prefer not having to sit through the credits myself... it's like I always prefer to watch Becoming on VHS over DVD because on my video there's no break between part one and two. You hear "FREEZE" and go straight to the lady-cop (suddenly remembering the B&BT recap where they asked exactly who called the cops...). You also get extended end-credits with a fantastic piece of Chris Beck music, which definitely holds the mood better than the BtVS theme. Hee. I think H is on the verge of asking me for M.E.'s address so he can write and complain that they put the Suite from Restless on the OMWF soundtrack but not Giles' dream solo. And they call me obsessed... And let's just ignore how I managed to take Pride & Prejudice and turn it into a Buffy post, m'kay? :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 12:39 PM [x] :: |
| l Sunday, January 12, 2003 |
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Conversation with Faithgirl on Yahoo IM:
faithgirl222: and how old is viggo's son? funkypurplesmurf: No idea funkypurplesmurf: This is just from the commentary faithgirl222: is he as hot as his dad? :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 7:38 PM [x] :: |
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Biggest. Squee. Moment. Ever.
I'm sitting there, listening to the FotR cast commentaries, and I'm up to the scene where Frodo wakes up in Rivendell. Gandalf has just finished the flashback with the eagle, Dom and Billy were commenting on Tolkien's obsession with the birds and Ian McKellen says the following: "When I suggested to Sean that he took Elijah's hand, it was because I thought anyone who knew the book would care about the deep friendship often of an innocently physical nature, and that might be missed by two resolutely heterosexual actors who might not appreciate gay people like myself saw in a touch something more meaningful than others might. So to persuade him to touch Elijah I would say, 'well, look, it's in the book'." Sean Astin then goes on to say how he's gotten fan letters from people who considered it one of the most important moments in the book, and Elijah says, "oh, it's fantastic. It's those subtle little nuances, man." (that boy is so American). I'm glad slashers were being looked after <g> I mean, I've never been a resolute slasher. I don't do the Kirk/Spock, I go for the Riker/Troi and Buffy/Angel. Although I have read the odd Picard/Q... I'll appreciate the CLex, but I like the Chlark more. The closest I've ever been is the odd penchant for the Angel/Spike and absolute adoration for the Buffy/Angel/Spike (did I just admit that?). We'll just ignore that Buffy/Fred fic, too... But when I watched FotR, I didn't know if there were any other Aragorn/Boromir slashers out there. I just knew that I really wanted to read some good fanfiction for them. It was the first time I slashed without anyone tempting me over "to the dark side". <Darth Vader> "Yes, Smurfy, I have an Angel/Spike website. Come join us, and together we can rule the internet as slasher and slashee!" </Darth Vader> When I get home, I do a search and suddenly discover that LotR slash is very much alive and thriving on the internet. Big, big, big time. I know Tolkien wouldn't have wanted his work interpreted this way. Even if the indications are that it isn't just tobacco in those pipes, I've read some of Tolkien's theology, and there's a reason he and C.S. Lewis were buddies at Oxford. C.S. Lewis was the most conservative, sexist theologian ever. I looked at some of his stuff when I did Religious Education at my Catholic high school (yes, I was a Catholic school girl even if I wasn't actually Catholic. I attended a Catholic school, okay?!) and did one of my major papers on ordination of women in the Uniting Church. Some of the things he said made me ill. It's pretty obvious from his interpretation of judgement day in the Narnia books where his theology lies (my Dad had chocking fits whenever we listened to those books on tape in the car), but I swear, his theological writings made those seem liberal <shudder> Anyway, even if Tolkien's turning in his grave over the manner in which slashers interpret his works, it's still there. And I'm very glad someone was standing up for the slashers on the set. Still not talking to channel 10. They insist on moving the final season of The X-Files around to a hundred and one different time slots, finally settling on 11.30pm on a Friday night. You try and remember that time slot!! Sheesh. I go to turn the TV off at 12.15am and catch the last scene or so of the episode, cursing myself like a fool because it's only been there a couple of weeks, and not even every week, so it's not the best thing to have to remember. So. Not. Happy. Last episode is on the 29th of January, a Wednesday, and movie-length so maybe they'll have it at a decent time slot. And no new episodes until then <sigh> :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 2:26 PM [x] :: |
| l Saturday, January 11, 2003 |
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 You Are The Tempest Almost-Kiss Take the Which Screwed-Up Chlark Moment are You? Quiz BTW, now have a LiveJournal, too... although I think the content there will be much the same as it is here. But I get to finally make signed comments. Just have to figure out how to use all the extra functions, though. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 12:04 PM [x] :: |
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My theory has been reinforced.
By now you should all know I am not only a BtVS fan, but a Trekkie. A Star Wars geek. I'm being sucked into Smallville (damn you, Molly!). I love Queer as Folk. I get obsessed with the "cult" TV shows. The ones that gather a really obsessive following, and cause us all to deride the creators/producers etc etc for "betraying" the vision and "ruining" the TV show/film. For selling out, for doing it all for the big dollar sign. For not ending the show when they should. I've been watching the extended Lord of the Rings DVD set, and a conclusion -- a long held belief -- has been continually stamped into my mind again and again as I listen to the commentary. Fans should be able to take over and make their TV series. Once there's a cult following, once something enters the conscious of the fans, they should have some say in it. Yeah, I'm typing this out at 11pm after a long day. Can you tell? <g> But, seriously. Look at the Buffyverse. Heaven help us all, look at CtS <shudder> Then look at all the wonderful fanfiction out there -- take the way Phil has described Willow turning evil etc etc in Angelic Knight. I didn't watch season 6 (duh) but even from sitting on the outskirts of spoilers/summaries etc for that season... tell me that wasn't brilliance, and a helluva lot better than the way M.E. handled that shit. When I went to my infamous symposium, the realisation that no matter how they end BtVS they can't please everyone was reinforced. As was the need to kill redemtionista Spuffy professors whose entire paper was "isn't Spike gorgeous, isn't Buffy a bitch for the way she treated him because we all know that Buffy was the abusive one and poor, poor Spike loves her so and treats her like a princess and isn't she just ungrateful and she was asking to be raped on her bathroom floor" but let's not go there. I have issues. Anyway. I know not everyone will be satisfied with how it ends (see my thing on watching The Gift) but I think us fans could write a better ending than Marti and Whedon'tcareanymore. Oh! Saw a fantastic new name for Croddy over on the BB. Twinkletwit. I like it. It's as good as my Xangel <g> I think there's a snarkfic in the making just to use the term <g> Trekkies have the same view, although given that the writer of Nemisis was apparently a Trekkie and it's still the way it's meant to be (not out over here, I'm going by what's being said by my fellow Trek fans) doesn't bode well. But I'm just upset on behalf of Wil Wheaton there. All the same, people have been pissed off at Rick Berman ever since he took over after Gene Roddenberry died (may he rest in peace). He did good with DS9, but then he went and made Voayger, Insurrection and, most tellingly of all, Enterprise. Brother N wants to know why I can watch Smallville and still ridicule Enterprise for everything it's done to Trek history. I tell him I'm not as involved with Superman lore and Lex is hot. Best part, though, of watching Ripley's Believe it or Not? Dean Cain keeps his glasses on. He always was hottest as Clark. Anyway. Where was I? Ahh, yes, Trek. And handing things over to the fans. It's a quarter past 11 on a Friday evening; like anyone can think straight at this time <g> I keep hearing complaints from people ::cough::Molly::cough:: that the Smallville peoples are ruining the show and destroying characters (however sad I find it that a show reaches it's peak in the first season <ducks>) -- again, a case where something should be handed over to the fans. I think they could respect Chloe's character a lot more, don't you? Although I think it is pretty cool when a series gathers such a cult following in its first season. The only fandom I've ever heard from that doesn't have this "what the frell are they doing to the show?!" is Farscape, but I only know a very limited number of Scapers. Or Firefly, but then there was only how many episodes of that one..? But then, the fans can show something such respect and revere it beyond the point the creator could have dreamed. Look at what Peter Jackson has done with Lord of the Rings. Could anyone have asked for more from the films? Yes, there have been people bemoaning the characterisation of Faramir, but that's about the extent of it, and who knows? Maybe there will be a slight redemption of the character in the extended DVDs. Another example is Spiderman. I'm not the Spiderman geek by any means, but from all accounts, Sam Raimi did a fantastic job, mostly because he has always been such a huge fan of the comic books. The fans usually know what they're talking about with a show. We know the characters and the canon backwards and inside out, usually better than the people who make the series in the first place. Sometimes, the best thing someone can do for a series or a film is listening to the people who made it a success in the first place. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 10:54 AM [x] :: |
| l Thursday, January 09, 2003 |
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LMAO!!!!
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 What's your inner fangirl? Take the test! BTW, there are bushfires in my area. We can't smell the smoke, but they're all through eastern Victoria, as people who live in this state may know. I just thought I'd say that they're not too near me -- they have to cross several bodies of water to get to me, and that's not going to happen. Just for the sake of my fellow Victorians who may read this and wonder. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 9:01 PM [x] :: |
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I know, I know, I'm not blogging as much as normal. Nor am I online at the normal times. We're in the middle of tourist season here, and so we, too, as a family have lots of visitors coming through our doors; people are taking advantage of free accommodation. It's nice to see people, though -- we never saw anyone when we lived in Mildura unless they came to us.
But it's just rude to sit on the computer all day when there are visitors. So I sit in my room instead and watch Aragorn in the extended LotR DVD. I'm also finishing a new layout for Maudlin Poetry... now I just have to find somewhere to host it, given Liquid2K has closed it's doors. At least, that's what I'm assuming has happened, given that most places don't just go offline for a couple of months like this. I still love Faithgirl's layout, and my own doesn't come close to her amazing skills, but I felt like playing around. It's also been the one layout since October 12th, too, so I'm feeling like a change in a lot of ways, I guess. Am applying for a job as a bank teller as I type this... very exciting indeed. What have I been doing? Nothing much at all... just passing time, I guess. Normally I can turn the most inane thing into a funny (or attempt at amusing) blog entry, but for that to happen I guess I need something inane to start with. H is watching The Gift as I type this... I'm not, as I don't want to be sobbing until I'm ill again, like I was when I typed the last entry out. I meant to say so at the time, but excuse any incoherency within that because it was mostly written at 1am with splotches from tears all over my glasses and I think I was still sobbing for most of it. So I get overly involved with TV shows. Like, was there anyone who didn't know that?! I have to say that everyone needs to get the 4-disk set of FotR, simply for the commentary. I'm a DVD commentary freak -- I love listening to film stories. And this one has five different commentaries <sigh> I'm in LotR bliss. I still haven't seen TTT... haven't been to Melbourne yet, and given that they refused to show all of the credits of CoS at the local cinema (thus I have no idea if we get the extra scene or if it's an urban legend) I'm not going to see it there out of moral outrage. I loves film credits. Watched a good film on SBS last night... Gloomy Sunday, a 1999 German/Hungarian co-production. Based on the legend behind the song -- the suicides' anthem, it was described as, with a short documentary/behind-the-scenes thing afterwards telling the full story, and how it was even banned as a song. I know the song as a performance on Sarah McLachlan's Rarities and B-Sides album, and I've always felt it to be the antithesis of Hold On. It's also my Buffy-after-the-end-of-Full of Grace-song. Hey, it's Sarah M -- everything with her has to come back to B/A ;) Sunday is gloomy My hours are slumberless Dearest the shadows I live with are numberless Little white flowers Will never awaken you Not where the black coach Of sorrow has taken you Angels have no thought Of ever returning you Would they be angry If I thought of joining you Gloomy Sunday Sunday is gloomy With shadows I spend it all My heart and I have decided To end it all Soon there'll be flowers and prayers That are said I know But let them not weep Let them know That I'm glad to go Death is no dream For in death I'm caressing you With the last breath of my soul I'll be blessing you Gloomy Sunday Dreaming I was only dreaming I wake and I find you asleep In the deep of my heart dear Darling I hope That my dream never haunted you My heart is telling you How much I wanted you Gloomy Sunday Gloomy Sunday Don't worry, I'm not in that mood right now. But as for the song and the film... well, there were points (many points) in the film where my eyebrows sky-rocketed -- like how they used every opportunity to show the heroine's breasts -- but as a film it was pretty good all the same. I'd watch it again, and it had the best twist at the end since The Sixth Sense. I cheered. Out loud. It also gave a rather cynical look at some people I've always admired, and so... lets just say if you watch it, you may look a little differently at Schindler's List. I'd recommend the film. What else is there to say but that I'm suffering a major case of missage. Hope to catch up soon, although with my aunt and uncle here it will be another Friday evening chat (my Saturday morning) I'll be missing. I'll try and get online again asap but no promises from my end. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 7:57 PM [x] :: |
| l Tuesday, January 07, 2003 |
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We were heading back from watching Chamber of Secrets when my fifteen year old brother H says, "I have a confession to make."
My mother, father and myself turn to him and ask him what said confession is. H looks sheepish. "I think I've fallen in love with Anthony Stewart Head's voice." I would like to hereby proclaim that it is proof that love of Tony Head's voice is genetic; as I'm pretty sure H is straight. Although I may be mistaken... I spent a small fortune on DVDs, though... I now own season 5 of BtVS, along with the 4-disk version of FotR. All I have to do is buy AtS seasons 1 and 2, and I'll never give Joss Whedon another cent, and you have no idea how blissfully happy that makes me. Mum and Dad asked me in the car on the way back where BtVS is up to in the USA, and I mentioned this fact. Dad asked me why this was. A beat as I try to decide how best to explain the spoonless theory to someone who thinks that knowing what an episode's title is and the name of all the characters is being insanely obsessive, without my family thinking I'm completely bonkers. "It's a long and convoluted theory that's garunteed to make you think I'm insane and for the sake of our continuing relationship I don't think I can explain it to you," I inform my father. "It's because they've abandoned the Buffy/Angel storyline," Mum tells him. "NO!" I cry out. "There's more to it than that and they haven't abandoned it -- it's all the WB's fault and..." I pause. "I probably shouldn't go here, right?" So how do you do it? How do you explain to your family why you refuse to pay for season 6 of BtVS, and the fact that AtS is the biggest load of bullshit ever filmed and... sigh. Anyway. I saw Chamber of Secrets, which will be known as CoS from here on. I would have just called it CoS but some people ::cough::Copper::cough:: didn't know what I was talking about last time I did that ;) I enjoyed it muchly, although I was glad I knew the books in this case. Ginny was unrecognisable if you didn't, given that there was none of her scenes with Harry etc. that's in the books. She's in three scenes and we're meant to know her? And Colin's role was also diminished overly, but I understand why. I'm just a little disappointed on their accounts, especially as despite my Harry/Hermoine preferences (reinforced by the film) I'm positive that Harry will wind up with Ginny, just as J.K. is going to put Ron/Hermione together. I love Snape, but I love Alan Rickman. So there's a logic in why I think he's sexy as all hell... have done so ever since I first saw Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves due to my mother's Kevin Costner obsession. And adore the guy in Sense and Sensibility (I'm a Jane Austen whore). I screamed when the spider broke into the car. And what's this stuff about vomiting slugs being the most gross part?! Yeah, it looked disgusting, but I felt more ill by the polyjuice potion, and always have. I also need confirmation on the scene being at the end of the credits... I tried staying in our small country cinema, but they refused to show all of the credits, to my disgust. They put their films too close together and needed the cinema. I always stay to the end of the credits. Not happy. The first and last time I go to the cinema there... I'll pay the bus fair and go to Sale or something. I want to see TTT in Melbourne on the bigger screens, and I may go and see CoS there again, too. I enjoyed it and so it wouldn't be wasting my money... much... I want pictures of Quidditch now. It'll take me months to figure out how to make them into a decent layout, so I should find them now so I can change next June. Anyway. BtVS season 5 DVDs. Biggest disappointment is the lack of commentary for The Gift. But I won't be destroying the DVD with Into the Woods on it (despite the fact it also includes the script for the episode)... special features on that DVD include Outtakes. All 2 minutes and six seconds of footage!!!!!!! Will have to look through the season 4 DVDs and see what special features they have... But I got commentary of The Body, which is also of the good. I don't think I'm going to be around much for the next week or so... not only do I have the new DVDs (Aragorn... Boromir... The Gift...) but when I went into Colins to get Copper's birthday present (which I don't know if will arrive before her mother gets back so we may have to do some rethinking there) I found a new Isobelle Carmody book. I read Isobelle Carmody throughout high school, and the thing is... she's into series. I read the first three instalments in the Obernewtyn series when the third came out at the start of 1995, when I was in year eight. It was during my year 12 exams in November 1999 when her fourth instalment in that series came out. I was recently re-reading Darkfall, book one of The Legendsong, which came out in 1997, and it's the second in that trilogy I found in the bookstore, released in December. And it's Big and Fat. I don't think I'd start reading another of her series today, but I don't know. All I know is I'm going to continue buying these ones until she's finished writing them because, dammit, I wanna know what happens!! later Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. I just watched The Body. Oh, God. I didn't listen to Joss' commentary. Oh, God. I'd forgotten how great that episode was. The first time I watched it, I said that if BtVS ever deserved an Emmy, screw Hush. It's The Body. Sarah Michelle Geller's performance... oh, God. The entire cast... the entire episode... it's still blowing me away, in case you haven't noticed. I know as a B/A shipper I'm meant to say that a B/A episode was the best ever made. Passion or Earshot or Becomining. But again we come back to that arc at the end of season 5, and I remember as I watch the awesomeness of The Body why, when I watched it the first time around (and I wasn't involved with any online discussion of the season) I said that it was as powerful, if not more so, than season 2. Then I skipped on to Forever and watched two scenes. Guess which ones? When I first started declaring my denial and "there is no spoon" etc. etc... when I first started to plan Attack of the Killer Monks as I stalked around the house in a rage, I was going to declare not that Angel was being held prisoner in Sri Lanka by demonic monks but that he was kidnapped by aliens on his way back to L.A. from Sunnydale after leaving Buffy in Forever. Watching that scene again I remembered why I said that. I know that it took, like, six hours to shoot because of the issues David and Sarah have with each other now -- and guys, I know that us B/Aers put a lot of pressure on the two of you. David, I know we probably contributed to the breakdown your marriage with our persistent rumour mongering. HOWEVER, the open hostility you hold for each other? Particularly David towards Sarah? So not helping your cause to convince us you never had an affair. Anyway, watching that scene again... maybe I'm just thirsty, but it reminded me of why I call myself a B/A shipper. Maybe she was just "seriously needy" and would have acted that way towards anyone, as certain shipper groups may have it. It doesn't change the fact that, despite the hours it took to shoot the short scene, I still saw the magic there. The look on Angel's face after the kiss... like, I'd forgotten how hard this was, why we needed to keep our distance. Why we needed to go and start forgetting. Now going to watch The Gift. Although I don't feel like I have all of the episode... again, it may be my B/Aer heart talking, but it's not the full episode without a minutes worth of There's No Place Like Plrtz Glrb at the end of it. Which is the entire reason I didn't write Attack of the Killer Monks as Creatures from The Planet of Greenox or something (was going for the B-grade sci-fi feel in the title, okay?!). If I'd had Angel kidnapped by aliens on his way back... well... we wouldn't have that last moment of Real!Angel, the last moment we ever saw him as he uttered "it's Buffy". Of course, he would have already been replaced by the Robo!Angel intent on submitting us all to our doom when he jumped up and down with Cordelia because he has "the taste of a gay man". But we can't win them all, even in fanfiction. later again I stand by what I said earlier. The Body is the best episode ever made of BtVS. But The Gift is still magic. Maybe the whole thing with the blood is... well... stupid and illogical. However, it got the episode where it needed to go. And go there it did. I watched the "previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer" bit frame-by-frame in a way I never could on VHS. And I understood more than ever, as they showed clips from every episode ever, how much of a bookend this was. How much of it was Becoming part 3. How it was the last episode ever. Don't kid yourself, this was the episode they planned to finish on. Yes, I'd have loved it to be the crossover bonanza we were promised, before the UPN and WB and bitterness and issues and open hostility set in. But this was still perfect, especially if it had included that last scene in Plrtz Glrb. "Now that's everything, huh? No weapons... No friends... No hope. Take all that away... and what's left?" In Becoming, she was expelled. Kicked out of home. Wanted for murder. Found the body of what could have been her sister, blaming herself for that death. Her Watcher had been tortured by the face of the man she loved. Then, unexpectedly, when she had just given up all hope of that man returning, when she was up against him with her friends egging her on to "kick his ass" and her mother casting her out of her life... he was returned to her. "I sacrificed Angel to save the world. I loved him so much. But I knew... what was right. I don't have that any more. I don't understand. I don't know how to live in this world if these are the choices. If everything just gets stripped away. I don't see the point." We have had a number of people, rather infamously, abusing Buffy for "taking the easy way out" and not being able to deal with the pain. This is a Slayer who knows pain. Who has lost her mother, has her friends telling her to kill her sister, is alone in the world in a way she wasn't even in Becoming. She really had lost everything, and she was the Slayer with the only other instinct left to protect her child. Because make no mistake, Dawn is as much Buffy's child as she is her sister (just ask the Spuffies who insist that she's the child of Spike and Buffy). Once, when stripped of every tie to the world, she managed to kill the man she loved, and faced pain you can't tell me she wasn't still feeling. The symposium I went to solidified my theory that not everyone is going to be happy with the final ever episode of Buffy. Especially with whom the final partner is going to be. For me, if the show had to go out any way, I'd want it to be with style. The Slayer is called, and dies. That is how it works. One dies, another is called. I liked it ending with bookends. With an arc that blows my mind with how long it went. As John Birmingham said, "All of a sudden -- BAM -- something explodes in your face! As a writer I wonder 'did they foreshadow five years of television' cause it all fits together so seamlessly." The Gift was filled with bookends. "Smart chicks are soooo hot." " You couldn't have figured that out in tenth grade?" A little note, one of the scenes in the "previously on BtVS" was Willow finding Xander and Cordy in the stacks. We had an Angel mention. We had Spike accepting she'd never love him. We had this arc of Buffy developing as a person, especially in her reaction to this situation compared to having to kill Angel, perhaps because she knew of the pain and anguish it causes. We had the marriage proposal. You can't tell me the series couldn't have easily ended with that shot of the grave. And if it did I would have been happy. Not just because it wouldn't have ended with Spuffy, either. :: Smurfette blogged for peace @ 9:01 PM [x] :: |
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| BLOGGY |
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[x] Blade |
| JOURNALS |
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[x] Alley |
| LINK-O-RAMA |
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[x] Amnesty |
| THE WEATHER |
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| CREDITS |
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Copyright Smurfette 2003 |
